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The line stretched down the street and around the corner. Hundreds of New Yorkers were waiting in front of FAO Schwarz, each one hoping to get their hands on a Bouncy Blue Bumblee in time for Christmas. It was the hot new toy of the season—the one every kid said they just had to have. Pikachu, Tickle Me Elmo, Furbees. . . they simply weren’t cool enough anymore. No, only Bouncy Blue Bumblee would do, thanks to the relentless advertisements that wormed subliminal and not-so-subliminal messages into impressionable children’s minds.
In the middle of the throng, Meg rubbed her gloved hands together and watched her breath make tiny clouds in the frigid air. “I get here six hours before the doors open, and I’m still eighty-second in line,” she grumbled to herself. Stomping her feet to warm up, Meg wondered if she should recount her exact position in line to alleviate her boredom. Maybe she was really, say, eighty-first in line. One could only hope.
Meg asked herself for the umpteenth time why she was freezing her tush off in the snow. “I woke up at four o’clock in the morning just for this?” She put her hand up to her nose and rubbed it vigorously to warm it. “Joey just had to have a Bouncy Blue Bumblee. Why couldn’t he want a Batman action figure or something? That’d be a lot easier to get. No waiting outside in sub-zero weather for hours. He doesn’t even deserve a Bumblee!” Meg thought back to all of the dirty tricks her eight-year-old brother had played on her. She frowned as she remembered the time he ran through the house waving her bras around when her crush had come over. Then, of course, there was the time he had taken her favorite sweater and used it to play tug-of-war with the family dog. Before she could be truly upset with her brother though, Meg remembered exactly why she was there. It was for all of the times he had been sweet and made her heart swell up with so much love that she felt like it would burst. She thought about the flowers he had picked for her that she eventually dried and made into bookmarks. There was the picture he had drawn of her when he was younger that she put on the ceiling above her bed so she would see it first thing in the morning. Two weeks ago, when she had the flu, he made her breakfast in bed. True, the toast was burnt and the eggs were runny, but it was still one of the best breakfasts she had ever eaten. Maybe Joey deserved a Bouncy Blue Bumblee after all. Besides, after four hours of waiting, Meg wasn’t about to give up. She would get her hands on a Bumblee!
Meg glanced at her watch and heaved a sigh. There were still two more hours to go until ten o’clock, when the store would officially open its doors. Shivering from the cold, she hopped up and down to get some of her chilled blood circulating. “God, I would kill for a Double Tall Espresso Macchiato,” she muttered. Her mouth began to water at the thought of the steaming caffeinated goodness. Meg turned around and eyed the middle-aged woman behind her, wondering if the lady would save her place so she could make a quick bathroom and coffee run. To test the waters, Meg flashed her most charming smile, the one her ex-boyfriend said could melt a heart of ice. In response, the woman glared at her. Meg rolled her eyes and turned back around. Maybe her smile wasn’t quite as charming as she had originally thought. Her ex had been prone to exaggeration. Then again, after standing ankle-deep in snow for four hours, her smile probably looked more pained than charming.
Looking up, she saw the teenager in front of her staring at her. He gave her an appraising look and examined her from head to toe. Apparently he liked what he saw because he then proceeded to leer at her. Meg decided to give him the same treatment. She started at his head. He had a bright purple mohawk that turned her off immediately. She looked down and raised her eyebrow at the sight of his tight pants.
“They’re leather,” the young man said, grinning at her. He evidently expected her to be impressed.
“I see. You should have gone with pleather. No cows would’ve been sacrificed.”
“You one of those animal rights activists?” He asked.
“Maybe.” Meg picked at a loose thread on her jacket and hoped he would stop talking to her.
“So, why are you buying a Bumblee?”
“My little brother really wants one.” She looked up at the sky and hoped he would get the hint this time.
“I’m just gonna keep mine in its package. I’m hoping it’ll become a collector’s item and then I can sell it off later and make tons of money.”
“Fascinating.”
“So, wanna go out on a date? I can show you a good time.” The boy ogled her again.
Meg stared at the tattoo on his neck that read “Master Pimp.” With a name like that, how could she refuse? Easily. “Not interested.”
“Fine. Your loss.” He finally turned back around to Meg’s great relief. She resumed what she had been doing earlier. In other words, she stared off into space.
Fifteen minutes later, Meg was ready to yank her hair out or let loose with a scream. She shook her head vigorously. It didn’t help her restlessness much. She started to shake various other body parts until soon she was jumping up and down, jerking wildly. A sudden poke from behind startled her, and she nearly fell over. The grumpy woman behind her was glaring once again. “You’re disturbing me. Stop it,” she growled. Meg looked at her in surprise. “Teens these days have no restraint,” she continued.
“You know, I have been standing out here in sub zero weather for the past four and a half hours or so, so I’ll do whatever I want. I’ll jump around and wave my arms if I want to. Frankly, I don’t care if I’m bothering you. Live with it,” Meg retorted. She waved her arms around for good measure.
“For your information, I’ve been here just as long as you have, and you don’t see me complaining about it, do you? You teens are a group of disrespectful crybabies.” Her thin lips pursed as if she had just sucked on one of those sour candy balls.
“For your information, I am an individual, not just a member of a group you feel like lumping me in with. You don’t see me going on about how old women long past their prime are jealous of the younger, prettier girls they see and take out all their anger on them. Also, you were disrespectful to me since you first opened your mouth, so why should I give you any respect?” Finishing her tirade, Meg took a deep breath. The woman just stared at her, mouth open in shock. Meg looked straight into the woman’s beady little eyes with The Look, the one her little brother said always gave him the heebie jeebies, until the older woman tore her gaze away. Turning back around, the corner of Meg’s mouth lifted just a bit as she reveled in her victory, small though it was.
Something was different. Meg cocked her head to the side, trying to figure out what had changed about the scene before her. She furrowed her brow and thought back to what it had looked like before she had her little spasm attack. Looking down, she saw a little girl standing in line in front of her. “Aww, she’s so cute! Hey, wait a minute! She wasn’t there before!” Meg said to herself.
Meg squatted and tapped the child on her shoulder. “Excuse me, but you weren’t in line here earlier, were you? People might get angry seeing you cut in front of them in line. Lots of us have been waiting out here for hours, and everyone really wants a Bouncy Blue Bumblee. Where are your parents? You should get in line with them,” Meg said gently.
The child looked at Meg with big blue eyes. “My mommy and daddy didn’t come with me. I really really want a Bouncy Blue Bumblee!” Her lower lip quivered. “You’ll protect me from all the mean scary people right?”
“Um, well. . .” Meg was in a conundrum. On one hand, she couldn’t bear to say no to the little girl and break the poor thing’s heart. On the other hand, Joey really really wanted a Bouncy Blue Bumblee too. She pictured the ecstatic look Joey would have when he opened his Christmas present. Of course, that would happen only if she managed to obtain one of the elusive toys.
“What’s one more person in front of you in line? And she’s so cute and young! How can you refuse?!” One of the voices in her head said.
“You’re already the eighty-second person in line. Now you’ll be eighty-third. What if there are only eighty-two toys? She’d be the one who took Joey’s toy. Do you want to risk it?” Another voice said.
Meg brought forth another one of her charming smiles and threw in a dose of sparkle in her eyes for good measure. “Of course I’ll protect you from the mean people!” The little girl smiled. “Now, why don’t you get in line right behind me, and then if a mean person comes, you can tug on my jacket, okay?” This made the little girl frown.
“But I want to be in front of you.” The little girl stomped her foot.
“Um, I think I could take better care of you if you were behind me.” Meg gritted her teeth and smiled again.
“You’re not going to let me get in line in front of you are you?” the girl shouted.
Meg looked around, but no one was paying any attention to the two of them. “Honestly, no. But you see, my little brother wants a Bouncy Blue Bumblee too, and I just want to make sure I can get one for him, especially after standing out here for so long. You could see if the woman behind me will let you get in front of her.” She looked at the girl pleadingly, hoping to win her over.
The little girl glared back. “BITCH!” she shouted. She kicked Meg in the shin, and then ran off.
“Ow!” Meg grabbed her shin and grimaced. “You better run, brat!” She shouted. Gasps of shock broke through Meg’s haze of pain, and she looked around to see everyone glowering at her. “She kicked me! And she called me a bitch!” Meg tried to explain.
“Yeah, right,” someone said. One man scoffed and threw a snowball at Meg. Other people followed his lead and snowballs flew through the air at Meg as she cowered under her coat.
One hour and thirty snowballs later, Meg peeked over the edge of her snow fortress and was relieved to see one of the salespeople opening the doors. “Finally! Once I buy the Bouncy Blue Bumblee, I can get away from this hellhole!” Everyone surged forward, and the salesman hurriedly jumped out of their way to avoid being trampled. People pressed against Meg from all directions, and she tried to stay calm as she was jostled one way and then another. She felt a wave of nausea hit her, but she gritted her teeth and shoved people aside, ignoring her claustrophobia as best as she could so that she could accomplish her goal.
Once inside, Meg took in a deep breath and extended her arms, enjoying the feel of the heated air against her body. She relished the moment of utter happiness at feeling warm again until she was rudely snapped out of her reverie by a shove. “Hey! Watch where you’re going!” she yelled to the retreating figure. Then she remembered her mission and hurried to where the Bouncy Blue Bumblees were displayed.
There they were in all of their bouncy blue glory. Unfortunately for Meg, the stack was rapidly diminishing and there was a crowd of people between her and the Bumblees. Meg gawked in amazement at the riot in front of her. She saw two women in a catfight next to the display, pulling each other’s hair and clawing at their faces with razor sharp talons. The guy with the mohawk yanked a Bumblee from the hands of a little old lady and tried to run off with it. Before he could get away, though, the woman clocked him in the head with her purse and snatched the Bumblee back. A surge of energy shot through Meg, and she began bulldozing through the mob, elbowing people left and right as well as stepping on quite a few feet along the way. Soon, she was right next to the Bumblees. As luck would have it, there was only one remaining. She leapt for it, praying she would be the one to get it. Her fingers touched the edges of the cardboard box, and she gave a sigh of relief. It was hers! Meg began to pull it toward her, but it wouldn’t budge. Confusion struck, and she gave the box another tug. It still wouldn’t move. Looking down, she saw another pair of hands on the box.
“Hey! It’s mine! Go find your own!” Meg yanked at the box.
“You find another Blum. . . Blim. . . blue thing! I got here first!” the woman responded. She tried to pull the box towards herself.
“No! You don’t even know what it’s really called! Let go!”
“No!”
“I’ll give you twenty dollars for it,” Meg pleaded.
“No deal. I got it first!” The woman tightened her grip.
“No, you didn’t! I did!” Meg planted her feet firmly on the ground and leaned back, pulling it with all of her weight. It still didn’t work. “I’ll break your fingers, I swear I will.”
“Don’t make me laugh. I’ve been threatened by bigger people than you. Your empty threats won’t work on me, missy.”
“You’ll rip the box!”
“You’re the one who won’t let go!”
The two females tugged back at forth on the box to no avail. “Enough is enough!” Meg met the other customer’s eyes and let all of her anger and frustration pour out of her eyes. It was The Look with a hundred times more power. Her eyes glowed a brilliant green and looked as if they would bore a hole through the older woman. Meg narrowed her eyes and focused her gaze even more. She thought about burning the woman to cinders with The Look. The other woman shuddered and loosened her grip on the box. Meg took advantage of the moment of weakness and smacked the woman on the forehead with the heel of her hand, hitting her just hard enough to make it sting a bit. The woman let the box slip out of her grasp as she grabbed at her forehead in surprise.
Meg jumped up and down in victory and hugged the Bouncy Blue Bumblee box to her chest. “Yes! I’ve finally got a Bumblee for Joey!” She looked at the box in her hands and wrinkled her nose. “I don’t see what’s so special about this toy. Joey’ll love it though. He’ll be ‘the coolest kid on the block with the hottest toy of the season’ to quote the commercial. At least my horrible ordeal is finally over! I can finally get a Double Tall Espresso Macchiato, go home, and relax.” She turned to the checkout lane, and her heart almost stopped. In front of her was a line filled with people ready to purchase their hard-won Bouncy Blue Bumblees that stretched all the way to the back of the store. Meg groaned and made her way to the end of the queue, steeling herself for another miserable few hours spent waiting in line.