Interlude: Despair

By: Shoujo Senshi--totally_kawaii@dragonslave.com

Where is he? He's always going off by himself, why can't he see that we're his friends? Strong and true, fighting together in the name of justice.

Why can't he see that I love him?

I sigh heavily and leave the fire. They don't notice me leave, they're fighting over food again. They'll be busy doing that for a while now, it's okay, I don't want them to notice me leave.

The forest is quiet, and cold. I wrap my cape around me and keep looking. I finally find him. He's sitting on the edge of a cliff, a foot or two back from the edge, legs drawn up in front of him. The moonlight shines on his light hair, and in his eyes.

His eyes are so sad.

Usually they're cold, closed, like he's drawn a veil across the secrets of his soul.

The veil's gone right now, I want to comfort him.

He looks up as I approach and his eyes are cold again, he's closed himself off.

"Are you all right?" I ask him.

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I would really just like to be left alone please."

After a moment, I decide not to do as he asks. I sit down beside him; he looks over, then looks away, ignoring me completely.

"Why do you always go off by yourself?"

"I prefer to be alone sometimes."

"Why?"

He gives an annoyed sigh. "Because sometimes I prefer the quiet."

"You don't have to be alone you know."

"I choose to."

"We're your friends, we care about you. I care about you."

He just stares into the darkness. I take a deep breath,

"I love you."

Silence.

"You'll get over it."

My heart is breaking, "What?"

"Have you ever been in love before?"

"No."

"Well, they say that the first is never the One. You will find the one you belong with."

"But - "

"It wouldn't work, even if I shared your feelings."

"You don't?" I can barely talk, there's a lump in my throat.

"No, I'm sorry, I don't."

"Do you care about me at all?" Anything, please, let there be something!

He is silent for a long time.

"Yes. You're my friend, almost like family I suppose, but please don't hope that it will become anything other than that. It won't. It can't."

There's silence between us for a long time, then he whispers, "I'm sorry."

I can't stay there anymore. I get up and leave without a word.

It hurts, I never thought it would hurt so much.

I don't make it very far before my legs give out as the tears begin to stream down my cheeks.


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